Regret. Moving Onward.

So it is official. After a year of telling myself, "Everything happens for a reason" and searching in vain for some hidden meaning within the awful, terrible, no good decision to leave Zürich, I have finally stopped. The jig was up when I saw this photo on Instagram. Climbers actually placed these lights on the Matterhorn to illuminate the route of the first ascent on its 150th anniversary earlier this month. I had always planned that during our last year in Switzerland, we would buy a GA so that we could zip off without restraint to see things like this and get to my list of hikes I was always too pregnant or not yet fit enough to complete. Sigh. We're not going to see those lights on the Matterhorn.

Fact: We never should have left Zurich and life would have been infinitely better if we had stayed. 

But we didn't. 

The very first moment we could, we got out of Duluth and came back home to the Northwest.  Now we are taking a year to recalibrate, recharge and reevaluate. On the one hand, it is hard to be unemployed, starting from scratch and feeling the sharp pang of regret. On the other hand, we came out on top with a paid move and signing bonuses that funded those last unforgettable European vacations before leaving. Another fact: The longer we had settled in, the harder it was going to be to ever leave Zurich. 

So is it out of the question that we would ever go back? Of course not. But for now, we are living in America, eating Mexican food almost daily and being close to family is pretty hard to beat. 


  1. Ugh! I know the feeling. We have been back stateside much, much longer than the time we spent living in Switzerland (5 years here/2 years there), and we still regret coming back. But how to get back?? It's just so hard these days. By the way, I finished my AMI Primary training back in May. It was such an amazing experience. When people in my program asked what inspired me to study Montessori, I would tell them it was a blog I stumbled upon. YOURS! Maybe my AMI diploma will be my ticket back to CH, but then there's the issue of finding my husband a job... Anyway, glad to see you back on this blog. Best wishes to you and your family!!

    1. Oh thank you! It makes me super happy to know you got your AMI diploma. I hope
      It comes in handy if you decide to apply in CH. :) And thanks for reading after all this time. xo

  2. hugs to takes a lot to say it out loud and own it...
    we moved across Canada (literally from one end to the other) and it was a terrible move...we lost a lot of money and time, BUT we did learn a lot of things about ourselves. Life is about living it, and learning from it :) You guys are doing amazing <3
    So happy to see you back in this space :)
    Never stop dreaming and trying new things <3

    1. Oh that's so reassuring. It gives me hope in a weird way to know that you know what it feels like the be going through this. Did you end up moving back? Still considering Switzerland?! ;)


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